THE CONSULTATION

So the first step in the process was the consultation.  A patient had told me once that she had done intrauterine insemination (IUI) at Columbia University Medical Center (CUMC) - Center for Women's Reproductive Care http://columbiafertility.org   I had googled the process before and discovered CUMC but never followed through, however I felt reassured to give them a try after speaking with my patient.  That was over a year ago.  So after numerous consideration I decided to take the leap.

On September 9, 2016 at 10am I had my consultation with Dr. Rachel McConnell http://columbiafertility.org/team-members/rachel-mcconnell/#.V9i_iDtcWFI.  Very lovely, pleasant doctor.  She received me in a very non judgmental manner, which I appreciated because not many people are or will be accepting of my unconventional way of having a child - unmarried and without a partner. But hey, like I told Dr. McConnell, the reason I'm doing this is because I'm 37 years old, I'm single, my biological clock is counting down, I don't want to wait for Mr. Right who may never come or may come when it's too late, I'm a professional career driven woman, my desire to be a mother far outweighs my desire to be a wife, you can find love at any age but you can't have a child at any age,  and I would rather have a child at an age where I can still have the energy to chase a toddler around the house.  In my profession I've encountered patients who are less fortunate than me, children having children - my youngest patient was 14 years old.  If they can do it, why can't I.

Dr. McConnell informed me of what the IUI process entails.  She told me that before I can have the IUI done I have to basically have a pre-IUI workup.  This entails testing to make sure I'm in overall good health.  I have to have my hormone levels assessed to see if they are in the moral range and check to see if my uterus can support a pregnancy.  Hormone levels to be checked are E2, FSH, LH, and AMH. In addition to hormone levels, I was told I had to have a pelvic ultrasound, HSG test, genetic testing, and a pap smear with testing for gonorrhea and chlamydia.  Some of these tests were mostly timed specific testing.  The E2, FSH, LH, AMH and the pelvic sonogram (I think to check the ovaries and measure the thickness of the lining and make sure everything is as it should be at that point in your cycle) all need to be done on day 2 of the menstrual cycle.  The HSG test has to be done between day 5 and 10 of the menstrual cycle.  Luckily for me, my period was due the day I had the consultation.

After my consult with Dr. McConnell I was seen by the nurse who went over the checklist or homework assignment as she called it.  It was basically everything the doctor mentioned to me in the consultation.  In addition, I was given information about recommended sperm banks where I could basically go shopping for the sperm of my choice.  The top recommended choice was California cryobank https://cryobank.com.

DEFINITIONS:

E2 - An estradiol test is a blood test that measures the amount of estradiol in your blood. It's also called an E2 test. Estradiol is a form of the hormone estrogen, and it's also called “17 beta-estradiol.” The ovaries, breasts, and adrenal glands make estradiol. During pregnancy, the placenta also makes estradiol.

FSH - In women, FSH helps manage the menstrual cycle and stimulates the ovaries to produce eggs. The test is used to help diagnose or evaluate: menopause; women who have PCOS, or ovarian cysts; abnormal vaginal or menstrual bleeding; or problems becoming pregnant, or infertility.

LH - A luteinizing hormone test measures the amount of luteinizing hormone (LH) in a sample of blood or urine. LH is produced by the pituitary gland. In women, LH helps regulate the menstrual cycle and egg production (ovulation).

AMH - Anti-Mullerian Hormone (AMH) is a hormone produced by the cells that support the dormant pool of eggs in the ovaries. Therefore, a higher level of AMH suggests a larger pool of eggs (or a greater ovarian reserve).

HSG -A hysterosalpingogram or HSG is an x-ray procedure used to see whether the fallopian tubes are patent (open) and if the inside of the uterus (uterine cavity) is normal. HSG is an outpatient procedure that usually takes less than 5 minutes to perform.

My "Back-Up Plan"

Have any of you ever seen the movie "The Back-up Plan" with Jennifer Lopez and Alex O'Loughlin? Well I'm about to live it.

Well, if you haven't seen the movie you should watch it.  I loved it!  It's hilarious.  Here's a synopsis - stolen from the internet:

"Tired of waiting for Mr. Right while her biological clock ticks away, Zoe (Jennifer Lopez) decides it's time to make an appointment at the sperm bank. On the same day as her procedure, she meets Stan (Alex O'Loughlin), a man with the potential to be her ideal mate. When Stan learns that Zoe's unpredictable behavior is the result of her pregnancy, he declares his commitment. As the due date approaches, both lovers realize that they really don't know each other without a baby in the picture."


Heres the you tube link to "The Back-up Plan:"

https://youtu.be/_66cm0DFlYg

Ok...well...not living the whole "Knight in shining armor rolling up on a white horse" part but "the tired of waiting on Mr. Right while my biological clock ticks away and making an appointment at the sperm bank" part is where I come in.

I'm 37 years young scraping 38 in the next few months.  Growing up, I always thought that by now I would have already been married with two point five children, a dog, the house with the white picket fence, the career and the whole shebang. Unfortunately life had other plans for me.  No children YET, not married...YET!!!  Matter-of-fact...still SINGLE.  However, career driven - RN for 8 years, recently completed graduate studies and now I'm happy to say I'm a Nurse Practitioner, oh...and I have a dog.  So 2 out of 6 is what...33.333333..% of my aspirations?  Not bad...I guess, since I'm one third the way there.

After a few failed relationships and or dating men who are not ideal to have children with, don't want to have children or at 40-years-old tells me he wants to wait 10 more years at which time I'll be almost 50 and probably menopausal or pushing menopause by then.  How selfish of them to want to date a woman who wants to have children at an age where her biological clock sounds like a drum thumping away in her head like a loud roar of thunder.  They don't seem to understand that while they can wait as long as ever...well almost or quite a while, we can't.  After age 35 our biological clock starts to count down and pregnancy becomes high risk with higher chances of having children with downs syndrome and such. An yes I know that with advances in technology such as assisted reproduction women can get pregnant and have children later on in life.  I know, I'm an OB nurse and the oldest patient I've had having a child for the first time was 52-years-old.  No offense to those women, I applaud you for making that choice, however, for me, personally,  I want to have a child at an age where I can still have the energy to chase a toddler around the house and when my child starts college I'm not in a retirement home.

Thus...The Back-up Plan was set forth in motion

As of September 9th, 2016, the process that has been weighing on me and eating away at me for years, has began.  My maternal instincts kicked in since the age of 28 and here I am, almost 10 years later, taking steps to fulfill that dream.  Love can happen at any age but having a child can't.  I've always told my friends and family that I want to be a mother more than I want to be a wife.